Tuesday, March 25th, marks 7 years that Matty earned his angels wings, known forevermore as his angelversary date. I know that this day is so hard for Matty's mom Sandy, father Johnny and brothers Chris and Zach. I'd have to say that I feel as anxious about this day as his family does, even though I never had the opportunity to meet Matty. However, I feel as though I've known him since the day he was born, thanks to all the things that Matty's immediate family does, as well as countless other people, who constantly do their part to keep Matty's memory alive. I know that Matty touched so many lives during his brief life here on earth. I also know, without a doubt, that even in death, he continues to live on and inspire so many peoples lives.
I learned about Matty during my first year as a member of the DFMC team. Berta Sinclair was on the team as well and she was paired up with Matty. Berta was Matty's Patient Partner and she would let us all know, prior to us heading out for our training run, how Matty was doing. As the marathon was drawing nearer, Matty's condition was deteriorating but Berta would give the group updates and asked us to keep him and his family in our thoughts and prayers. Below is a picture of Berta and Matty. Runners signing banners for people battling cancer, young and old, is a common practice during DFMC training season.
My first marathon was April 16th, 2007, just three short weeks after Matty earned his angels wings. What completely amazed me more than anything was seeing Sandy and Johnny at the Pasta Party, just 3 weeks after Matty went to heaven. As it was my first Pasta Party, I really had no idea what to expect that afternoon. Matty's life sized poster was the first of many posters everyone saw before they entered the two large ball rooms where the pasta party was to be held. Little did I know that shortly thereafter, the "In Memory" portion of the program would take place. There is not a dry eye in the room as the picture of each child, paired up with a runner who is running in their memory who has passed away from cancer, is shown. To this day I don't know how Sandy & Johnny were able to sit through that just 3 short weeks after Matty went to heaven. But, having gotten to know them since, I can understand why they were there and have continued to take part in the DFMC season ever since. They are so grateful to the Dana-Farber Cancer Institute, the Jimmy Fund, Boston Children's Hospital and of course the Dana-Farber Marathon Challenge.
I wanted to use this weeks blog entry to honor Matty's brave battle with cancer by sharing some of the many pictures of Matty, his family, and some of the ways he continues to inspire so many, even though he is no longer here. Matty definitely left a legacy and I think that by the time you finish looking at these pictures of him, you'll understand why. They are in no particular order.
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| Another one of his infectious smiles! |
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| Matty, Zach & Chris |
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| Sandy & Matty, hand in hand ! |
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| Matty with "Courage" Courage went to heaven with Matty! |
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| There was nothing Matty couldn't do! |
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| Fenway Park |
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| Chris, Zach & Matty! |
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| Matty sure loved cereal |
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| Johnny's return from his 2nd deployment. |
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| As always, Matty smiling, even during a chemo treatment! |
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| Matty & Jason Varitek |
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| Matty in his SpongeBob shorts |
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| First day of school |
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| Matty & Zach |
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| Matty loved being a "big brother" to Zach |
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| Chris & Zach honoring their brother! |
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| A tattoo of Matty on Johnny's arm. |
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| Balloon release on Matty's birthday. |
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| Just one of MANY blood drives !! |
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| NStar Walk for Boston Children's Hospital |
The Dubucs' epitomize the quote "it's not the hand you are dealt, but how you play it." I'm pretty sure the only thing in life worse than burying a parent as a child is burying your child. They never cease to amaze me on how much they do to give back. As I mentioned before, so many people played an integral part in Matty's care and they have never forgotten that.
Matty was diagnosed with Stage IV Hepatoblastoma on July 6, 2004. Shortly after finding out on August 1, 2005, that the cancer had returned to his lungs, a web page on CaringBridge.org was created and Sandy regularly made entries. To this day, Sandy periodically posts journal entries on the web page. Each time she makes an entry, I am sure to read it. Below is Sandy's entry from a few days ago. I'm including it here because I think it's a powerful explanation of what she and her family deal with on a regular basis.
"I always tell my boys not to say the word, "stupid" but in this case, I think it's ok. Stupid cancer!
Matty's angelversary is Tuesday, March 25th. I love that it falls on Greek Independence Day, knowing that so many people will be wearing blue. My boy must love that!
There's a facebook page "Silent Grief - Child Loss Support" that posts my exact thoughts, on a daily basis. This was today's post:
No matter how many years our child has been gone, we will always miss our child. That doesn't mean we are stuck in grief. It simply means that we will always feel that void left by our child and it's quite normal - totally normal - to miss the one who filled that special place in your heart. Yes, life will eventually go on. We realize that. But, life will never be the same, nor will we ever be the same. Hearts touched by child loss are broken hearts and a broken heart will always feel the ache of missing our child. The cliche "time heals all things" does not apply. Time doesn't heal. Time helps us to quiet our tormented hearts, but it never takes away the pain. We will always and forever miss our child, and we long for that day to be with our child again!"
"I miss Matty so much!"
Stupid cancer!
If I could ask everyone to do me a big favor on Tuesday, please take a few minutes from your day to think of the Sandy, Johnny, Chris & Zach and offer up a prayer to them. I know they will go about their business on Tuesday with a heavy heart. Also, if you weren't able to tell from all the pictures, Matty's favorite color was blue. If possible, please wear something blue on Tuesday to help honor Matty.
On behalf of Sandy, Johnny, Chris and Zach, I want to thank all of your for whatever it is you'll do on Tuesday.
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